Tonight I am praying for peace. Peace in my life, Peace in my mind, Peace in my heart.
This day has been a very hard day. Actually I should say this week, but today it all came to a head. Last weekend my good friend informed me that she was going to have a baby. Now please don't get me wrong, I am happy for her, very happy for her. Even though I am happy for her, I have been getting sadder and sadder as this week has gone on. I feel the depression seeking up on me. Everyday I remind myself of the wonderful things I have and that my life is great! Even though I remind myself of these things it doesn't kept me from thinking of the things I have lost in the past and the things I can not have. This morning at school it was just to much and in the bathroom I feel apart (tears and sobbing) and then had to pull myself back together because there were 30 children on their way to school for me to education.
I have always been told that I am a stong person. Sometimes my strong side retreats and leaves me weak.... very weak. I know in a day or so I will return to the person I know I am and will continue on with my life, enjoying the good things and keep going. For now though I look to the heavens and asked God for the help I need to get through this night.